The Real Race: Competing Against Yourself, Not Others
Since we’re on the topic of goals, I wanted to share an experience that happened last month. As some of you may know, I’m currently training for HYROX, a global fitness race that’s coming to Hong Kong at the end of November. It’s a competition designed to test your endurance, strength, and overall fitness, and I’ve been attending HIIT classes regularly to prepare for it. The classes themselves have a competitive yet friendly atmosphere, which helps push everyone to achieve their fitness goals.
A few weeks ago, a gym friend of mine, who’s in excellent shape—runs faster, lifts heavier, and crushes the distances on the ERG machines—suggested we race together during the competition. I immediately sensed that his motivation wasn’t just about camaraderie. He needed someone he felt he could outpace, and that was his driving force to compete harder. In other words, he wanted a "competitive rabbit"—someone to stay ahead of for motivation.
I politely told him that we likely wouldn’t be able to race together since we were in different age groups. Curious, he asked how old I was. When I revealed that I was 10 years older than him, his companion laughed and said, “You’re racing grandpa!” My gym friend then started to begrudgingly compliment me, saying how fit I was for my age. Any pride he had from being faster or stronger than me seemed to fade the moment he realized I was a decade older. “I hate how fit you are!” he joked.
This interaction stuck with me for a while, and I realized something important: HYROX, and fitness in general, is about pushing myself to achieve my goals, not about measuring myself against someone else’s abilities.
The Trap of Comparative Motivation
It’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to others, especially in a competitive environment. Having a “rabbit” to chase can be useful in short bursts—it gives you a target, a marker to pass, and an extra push of motivation to reach new heights. But when you make that rabbit the ultimate goal, you lose sight of what truly matters: your own growth and progress.
My gym friend’s initial motivation to race alongside me was based on the assumption that I was someone he could beat. His pride was tied to being faster, stronger, or more athletic than me. But when he learned I was relatively older than him, his perspective shifted, and that goal had become somewhat less desirable. His motivation, which was rooted in comparison, faltered.
That’s when I realized: You’re not in competition with anyone else’s journey. You’re in competition with yourself.
Setting Your Own Goals
For me, training for HYROX has been about pushing my limits—improving my endurance, increasing my strength, and testing my mental resilience. Yes, there are faster runners, heavier lifters, and people with more experience than me. But that’s not the point. The point is to track my own progress, to celebrate my own milestones, and to meet the goals I’ve set for myself.
There’s value in having people around you who push you to be better, just like there’s value in a friendly competition. But the ultimate goal shouldn’t be to beat someone else; it should be to become the best version of yourself.
The Takeaway: Don’t Let the Rabbit Distract You
In life, as in fitness, it’s important to recognize when you’re chasing someone else’s goals instead of your own. Having a rabbit as a race marker is useful, but don’t let that rabbit become your sole focus. Your true competition is the person you were yesterday, not the person running next to you.
Ultimately, the finish line is yours to define. Whether you’re racing toward a fitness goal, a career milestone, or personal growth, the real victory comes from knowing you gave it your all—for yourself.
So, as I continue training for HYROX, I’m reminding myself of this: I’m racing against no one but me.
